Wife.

So I have been married just over a year (June 18th, 2011) and I have a confession to make, I am still not the greatest at this whole 'wife' thing. Married life is great, but it really does show you your imperfections smack dab in the face. We are selfish people and I am by no means an exception. God however has blessed me with an extremely giving and caring husband that he makes my life so much easier.

I am learning to put my husband first and slowly but surly God is working in my heart. Last night I went grocery shopping and did something I actually never do and I felt so guilty that I have never done this before, I actually shopped with the thought process of 'What would Brent want?'. Typically I get what we both like, or what is healthiest even if I know he doesn't like it or that he has a different preference and is compromising for me. He compromises a lot in our relationship and I realise I am so head strong and stubborn I do not like to give in. So this was a simple way that I was able to serve him. I refrained from buying whole wheat pasta because I know he does not like it. I got him some gelato because he likes that over ice cream, I bought skim milk instead of 1%, spicy red pepper pasta sauce and I even searched the selves for high pulp orange juice. I enjoyed doing this and it made me happy to know he would be excited when he got home from work.

I know I need to serve him more, I need to be more attentive and uplifting to him. These things are not easy and anyone who says it is easy I would have to say is lying. We live in a society where we are taught to put yourself first, to make sure you get the best and I think I for one am extremely bad at that. I always want the bigger piece or the nicest looking one, given the choice I will always take what is best, and yes, even when it is just between my husband and I. Maybe that is my competitive side coming out, its ugly, trust me.

So I don't have this wife thing figured out, but I am working on it, I am learning and growing and trying my best. I knew I would never fall into being your typical domestic type wife, but I am shocked at what chores I adore doing. I love buying the simple household items like toothbrushes and deodorant, and baking, I have become passionate about baking. If only it wasn't bad for your I would do that a lot more.

It is not always easy, but I do believe that self sacrifice and trying hard are key components to growing in our marriage.